$tay ¢old

 
Jigga please. Stop ho’in it up on the Interwebnets. No nudity? What is she doing, sucking a horse? Speaking of horses … nevermind.

Drop the chicken noodle soup and soda and mount that elliptical. Another one to add to that homemade “Workout Plan” mixtape: “Exercise.”
And Aunt Jackie wit it. Is Aunt Jackie fat? I don’t care, she makes me dance. And where’s the Harlem tag when you need it?

GEDDIT HAHAHA. What? Sorry.
Reasons to still go to the Meadowlands Fair, on through July 8:

You know what would be nicer than seeing Gogol in July amongst slavo-gypsypunk-philes in New York? Seeing Gogol amongst gypsypunkphile slavs. Yes I would sit through an hour of techno for that. There has to be vodka around that place. Maybe marinated herring.

Via Bumpino the Magnificent at Wtfuchattin:
In order to retain smoking amidst the ban, Brit pub becomes embassy for uninhabited island.

Does this mean guido hairstyles will look normal in a charred environment? That’s a stretch and I know it.

Anyway, a blaze, probably not from ciggy butts (but it’s not entirely impossible) hit the casino commission’s HQ in Atlantic City.
Says the En Why Tee:
A fire damaged part of the state Casino Control Commission headquarters […]

^(Chase: Que sera, sera! I’m in France, bitches!)^
Tony’s not dead. He was just sleeping. But he dreamed about ordering onion rings for the table at a family meal. Carmela didn’t order any onion rings, but she did issue a hit on Tony. Meadow, possibly pregnant, was totally wearing the wrong shoes for parallel parking or […]

It’s done. The final episode of “North Jersey On HBO” is over. And my heart is still pounding. If you didn’t see it, you are Leotarded. If you don’t get that, you don’t care.
My first reaction in the run up to the final episode these past few days had been, “well, I don’t know […]

It can be pretty. It can have talent. It can be fit.
For London 2012, how about a smiling Mike Skinner as the picture of British handsomeness (David who? pshh) rendered with sidekick and similarly dental(ly?) interesting Professor Green.
For £400,000 they came up with this thing instead. Well, it wasn’t a Maddy poster, I guess.

So I just heard the whole new Dizzee Rascal album “Maths and English” and I have to say I can hear them sirens coming (= this CD is gonna be played to smithereens in a certain ho’s vehicle). So nevermind the fact you might’ve heard “Sirens” and “Pussyole” already, there’s more. Yes, more.
He brings out […]

In North Jerz, our middle schools get rid of termites and students – extra early!
Gas mask is the new fluoro. Hot.
I love you, West Brook Middle School!
What I want to know is, can I now sue the town to take a chunk out of potential grad school debt? So far I’ve got a pedophile teacher […]

Zach Braff on Jersey.

^^still questionable.^^
Paramus, holla! I almost forgive him for the sappy end to “Garden State” now. Maybe. Let’s just forget that and go with “Scrubs.” They should’ve had Kenan do something funny with the arena, like explode himself or maybe not since that’s gonna be Giants Stadium and it’s an implosion. If […]

Yeah, New Order apparently broke up (or not) but “Control,” the story of its forbear Joy Division, directed by band photographer Anton Corbijn, is getting good reviews over in Cannes. New Order (with a part in the soundtrack) and Deborah Curtis are attributed with consulting roles to the film, which is said to draw from […]

Via a Brit, New Order split.
Lemme at that “Control” flick and the soundtrack.
Imma play “Regret” and “Crystal,” maybe even “World in Motion” this weekend. Maybe the New Order documentary lata
What’s your fave New Order track? Let a ho know.

Really. Play “Keep on Callin’” and you’ll see. If not, reply and we can bitch it out.
In the track, he sounds a lot less like Crazy Frog in human form, you’ll have to admit that.
Ortiz is soundin’ real nice. Laugh at the haters with “Hip-Hop” and all those tracks about suicide, eggs for dinner and […]

It’s a better Thursday all of a sudden.

“Hit That.”
Go get it!
Now!
I got it from producer Bangladesh’s page. Peep that zoom zoom zoom and a boom boom oh-ah-oh-ah-oh-oh. And “Boyz” radio rip for you, too. You can hear that weird Zane Lowe “Meeyuh” thing at the end. Wtf. Album “Kala” out in August. Just in […]

For all the beef-spectators, the Jay-Z-related camp is back to blows with the Dipset dudes. But actual blows. When Tru-Life came out with “New New York” I was all about him. Now he’s got Jim Jones’ ring. And Cam’ron got sucker-punched? Oh my.

Listen to Def Jam’s boy talk to Ed Lover and Egypt from Power […]

Yeah. Jim McGreevey has been accepted to a master’s program. Master in divinity. At the General Theological Society of New York. Um.
“Former Gov. James E. McGreevey, who was raised as a Roman Catholic, was officially received into the Episcopal religion on Sunday at St. Bartholomew’s Church in New York, said the Rev. Kevin Bean, vicar […]

And you probably should, too. It is not every Monday post-2 a.m. when the North Jerz Ho actually expounds her love for another region. Actually it is often not ever the case. So this is special. (Forget the fact that I have fam there. I didn’t even see his ass. Who goes to fraternity formals […]

What better topic to debut Stay Cold’s new recurring column “North Jerz Ho,” written by the author of the same moniker, than the recent Don Imus media frenzy? In the following post, North Jerz Ho deconstructs the term “ho,” and explains why it’s unacceptable for a racist d-bag like Don Imus to use it. […]